I am an ox·y·mo·ron

Ox-y-moron


noun, plural


A figure of speech by which a locution produces an incongruous, seemingly self-contradictory effect, as in "cruel kindness" or "to make haste slowly".





Or in my case, the oxymoron is "works from home".





I may have mentioned that I have left the comfort and security of a regular paycheck for the 'we may not have much, but we have each other; everybody needs to make sacrifices, because mommy is working from home' option.





The tipping point that lead to my decision to leave my full time job and venture into self employment, came after a discussion with Big Daddy when he asked me if we wanted to leave Big in charge of the house at the age of 5. We had already seen a version of "Lord of the Flies" over the Christmas break when four 4 year olds ran around our place like the tazmanian devil, leaving a trail of destruction throughout the house. Would that display of wild crazy children be our future if I returned to work? More than likely, and we were in the unique position of being able to make the investment in our children to modify our work lifestyles. Most families aren't in the position to make those kinds of changes.





Also, my supportive (but blunt) mother described for me in great detail that should I return to work, my positive and healthy relationship with my sons would likely turn into a full fledge battle partnered with copious amounts of yelling at children who never seem to move fast enough to get out the door. This would of course cause extra stress, that would be followed by name calling (which I would later regret) and frustration for all parties involved. Some families are able to handle the stress of this push and pull of childcare arrangements, pressures of demanding jobs, friends and family better than others. We are not one of those families.





So after some long discussions and a lot of courage we jumped feet first into self-employment.


The home office is now the dining room table. The laptop I purchased is always on so that I can try to get 5-10 minutes of work done every 3-4 hours between nap times, play dates, laundry, snuggling babies, disciplining 4 year olds, feeding, changing and diapering. I work alot at night and drag the boys with me when I have an appointment. To make it up to them, we make lots of trips to local parks.





We are all adjusting to this new lifestyle.





I work from home, and sometimes, I even get work done.





Maybe I am not an oxymoron after all.